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Seedlings

Respirate everything smells like Art, Poetry, abstract.

10 resolving quotes. 

Here are 10 quotes I wrote when I was going through anxiety issues which I think will help you too to resolve inside:

Sometimes the abandoned lost and lustrous galaxies give rise to star clusters and planets so wild that anyone outside dare not to understand or tame the majesty but they do follow the ripples of colliding black holes while the wanderers return back to home of nowhere.

* No matter how hard you try to shape your outer world according to the frame of desires and  bliss, the longing for peace will only rest when you shape it inside.

* Talking to one’s own self may be considered as an act of madness or psychic issues but don’t listen to them who say this rather talk to yourself in the way you are with all the worries and mistakes and guilts you have,  trust me it heals. 

Once you learn how to walk you can walk all through your life but it doesn’t mean you will never fumble in future because those are the rhythms of life size invisible piano, nobody knows about the high and low notes. Only practice can make you go smoother. 


Many people are scared of experimenting new things or the things they once failed. The fear of yesterday can consume the possibilities of today. So,  remember One today holds the power to erase all the yesterdays. 

The very illusive thought about being in love is keep talking oblivion. But in reality there are gaps and silences and days without any actual conversations and those are days when people can’t believe the discourse. For that you must know if you can’t sustain with silence and accommodate gaps, you can’t ever handle love.

People underrate humour and sarcasm and overrate intelligence for which I think intelligence is fatal because it will die proving itself but humour needs no acknowledgement rather holds a sarcastic laugh and leaves.

Life is contemporary. There are furrows I don’t want to be filled, hills I regret climbing, separations I celebrate and guilts I romanticise. I do believe in magic of tears as smiles. There is purpose to eeverything until you don’t get stuck at one. 

I stay very indifferent from calculating results for all I have is this day with no past participating in it and no future ahead. 

Be a collector of stories about people who inspire, of small kids who revolt against stereotypes, or traditions left behind in the race of innovations,  of countries avoiding war by Burning themselves, and relate yourself to them, recite stories of your growth as you are young and fully functional because you can easily deny death but can’t stop wrinkles replacing glow. Utilise yourself now.


*All the pictures are self portraited mobile shots.


 


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Draw Map to yourself.

Do not expect people to guide you out. Don’t expect them to eat the hurdle which falls in your plate. You look outside so much that you forget your way to inside.

You start confusing peace with pleasure, travel with treasure, adventure with amenities.

If you wake up each day to get validations, considerations and acceptance by others you will never feel satisfied and enough because when you start finding yourself among several thousands views, judgments, criticism, advice, warnings, their own failures and their own formulas to success, frustations and what not! Eventually you will start filling yourself up with vengeance, negativity, darkness, self negligence, lack of redemption, growth and self transformation because people do fake out and if you do manage to find someone honest out of the blue then you know what? 

Reality is relative, what they suggest is their own version of problems Vs solutions and is not at all ideal. Why don’t you create yours rather than borrowing it at risk of failure because even you fail, you know who to blame at first place and why? Hence, lower the risk of befooling yourself by blaming others. 

You should know yourself the best before someone else, your win, your loss, your happiness, your flaws all should be celebrated by you before the audience outside announce it Loud, your inside audience should applaud or remorse first. Inhibitions are there because we don’t talk to ourself. You belong to no ones tagline, stereotype, colour, creed, possession or obsession of someone else’s reflection because you belongs to yourself.

Success is not constant and so as failure, they are always relative to subject of comparison. The people who criticise you today may cheer for you some other day but you know whose the constant person through all your black-white-grey and blue-green days ? It’s you, recognize that !

The sooner you realise that no one is perfect enough to judge you and no one is versatile enough to understand you and no one is complete enough to fill you, the better frequencies you will witness and fuller you will feel.

So stop emptying yourself for others because the Map of your journey lies inside you and all you have to reach is for your arms hugging you like no other. 

Atheism – The Odyssey 

Believe me it’s hard not to believe –

I am an atheist last since 5 years from now and believe me it’s not about being trendy, cool, ignorant, arrogant, intolerant, haughty or cheek!

It was way painful initially. It was like someone suddenly said you are not who you are! It was like my curiosity pulled me into an abyss of never ending shuffle of questions and modified answers and innovations and discoveries and suddenly it seems like nothing exist for permanent except evolution and I am no sorry that the concept of God never pleased me regarding my queries.

When I say I am Godless I don’t mean to say ‘ I am smarter than you -theists’ because when I say Godless or atheist – I am saying I am agnostic, clueless about the roots being the tree and it’s never the say of pleasure, my fellow theists!

You know how devastating it was for me to deny the creator? You know how much anxiety I suffer even in till date I panic about loopholes, about wormholes, about blackholes, and dark matter -Yeah you guessed it right a physics enthusiast i am and I agree science is more familiar and kind towards my question of existence than God who choose not to answer anything directly!

I am not saying I am getting any kind of satisfaction being a non-believer but definitely I nurture my curiosity each day being in search of that invisible, invincible!

Experimenting God is so necessary now!

At-least I am not quitting against my anxiety and accepting the stereotypical, unreasonable legacies letting me into illusions of arrange marriage with the concept of God !

How can someone with no eyes to go through and no lips to follow – wants me to believe the unsaid because being a writer I can read a blank face but not Literally!

But I am thankful towards God for putting this question in my mind that if not He than Who?

To be frank I know atheists are in the mid of nowhere, I know they struggle daily, I know when they say “atheist” people Judge them in no time, I know how it feels not having anyone to pray but to pay hardwork for anything you desire.

The biggest confusion I face while explaining myself to people is while making them understand that I am an atheist but I am Spiritual! Making them realise that No ! Spiritually is not all about having an imaginary creator’s acceptance.

Rather I can’t explain you my chaos of being an atheist. People who believe in god – Listen, I respect you, no offence but please don’t drag me into your world of imaginary enchantments or announcements I never heard to witness.

I can’t just accept the reason you believe in God because everyone does the same and because you need faith to rest upon- because STOP! ” Faith is independent of God “ unless you are desiring out something from it!

For the sake of reasoning–

“Believing is too old to innovate and question, I believe that temporary is the only permanent, I believe every moment is new and fresh and indifferent with the previous, I believe I should question each and everything I am theistic for – each day so that I can answer my world of atheists and discard myself if I fail to! ”

For I am not growing old but transforming young peeling off my skin to let my soul be one with the universe and to Resonate with it’s natural frequency of Atheistic hymns.

Lend me your Spine 

Most people don’t have it actually, Spine or the backbone or the vertebral column or the descent of Medulla Oblongata touching your Kundalini. 

No biologically they have it but mentally they are too empty to standing with their words nowadays. When I need people – rare of the rare times though, I want them to lend me their spine, their stretch of confidence, their sheer firm. 
I see more spine in the kids than in adults or grown ups kids(teens) you can say. It’s easy to find spine in dogs than people. They literally suck when it comes to concrete taboo issues Like Sex and women , Rape culture, Marriage, Equality and Equity, Patriarchy, Existentialism, Religion .

I am not saying getting vulnerable is weak or getting weak is bad or being bad is permanent because permanent is the biggest transience. What I mean to say is so much hidden in every reader, that it’s ok to wear an opinion, that it’s ok get judgemental after observations, that it is ok to take stand and debate, that it’s ok to say I have a spine for every thing changing into clarity and more substantial. 

Every water Drop is capable of withdrawing an Ocean inside, just trust the potential. 

Don’t let yourself being drown somewhere inside the opaque chaos of Stereotypical legacy. Talk and appreciate, talk and criticise, talk and redeem -but initiate. No topic is taboo, no subject is characterless or sacred or dark when you hold a backbone flexible enough to bring it into lights. 

Modelling or Metaphor ?

​I really don’t know what you perceive when I say modelling. For some it’s the collection of stylish clothes, shimmery lip colours, flawlessly flowing hair and what not ! But then accordingly -I am a complete outsider in case of modelling. 

I am no model for advertising anything which is less than being human. I don’t go for waxing, threading or shopping before getting myself clicked, yes I like it that way – random, rugged, crude and raw.

 I like people wearing stories rather than make up, I like eyes not with perfect strokes of eyeliner or kajal on it but the smokiness  of smudged black around. People like me prefer to wear Metaphors around their palms, their curves are not perfect but they convince them like their child, their ankles are locked with freedom of flats rather than those suffocating fancy heals and by saying all these materialistic things.

I am not at-all criticising those models who put a lot of efforts in getting ready but it’s just I am trying to explain how effortless I believe in being the subject for the object(camera). 

So hence, If it’s not the hierarchical modeling then Either I may be a complete Noob or a Revolution, but I do it this was only, my way, the way most humans without layers could touch and resonate. 

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